The Drs told me AF would arrive around 6 weeks after the surgery, but I’m now just over 7 weeks post-op and there’s no sign of her. Typical that the one time I want her to show up she’s nowhere to be seen! I can’t even gauge where I am in my cycle as I have no idea when or if I ov’d. I’ve certainly had a lot of what I class as OV pain and ewcm over the past few weeks but whether it meant anything I don’t know… It would be great to think I may be pregnant again but I shan’t hold my breath on this. Also, although I would be absolutely thrilled to be pregnant, I’d also be quite scared at it happening so soon after the op. FYI being a POAS addict I have taken a couple HPTs recently; one a couple weeks ago just to check there was no HCG present so any positive tests in the future would mean a new pregnancy, and then one this week just to see if that OV pain a couple weeks ago could possibly mean anything.
So, where am I 7 weeks on – physically, healing is still going well. I’ve finally lost all my stitches and the scars, although very red, don’t look too bad. The scar on the left side does hurt on occasion, particularly when the water from the shower hits it or if I catch it by accident.
Emotionally the healing is much harder. I expected it to be easier by now, but it’s not and the last couple weeks have been particularly hard and I’ve been very down. Everywhere I turn there are people having babies, or just enjoying their time as a family, adverts on TV are full of happy families, walking down the street I’ll pass several mums with their babies. There’s just no escape. I wouldn’t want to take that away from anyone, but again I can’t help but ask “when will it be our turn”? I guess my feelings aren’t helped by it being the anniversary of our fourth miscarriage a couple days ago – each time we’ve had a loss I’ve vowed to myself that by the time the anniversary comes round we’ll have a baby, or at least be expecting one. So far I’ve sucked at keeping that vow.